It is advisable in any society for people to be slow in making conclusions or judgments, based on rumors or information from second persons. However, it is notable that the rush in judging has left numerous people with unsubstantial appalling images. The recent rumor that went round about me shocked my heart due to the weight and the aspect of the morality of the matter. My boss, as it rumored, is young married and pretty woman. The fact that she is pretty does not open gateway for me to engage in extra marital affairs with her. This is a shocking and wrong accusation which is not acceptable at the individual and society levels. However, it should be observed that the human nature is subjected to speculation which in most cases is not beneficial. Significant speculation is negative. My case being an example put me in a tongue-tied situation.
At first, I assumed as if it was not me, but when the truth dawned on me and realizing that, if I can not stand and protect myself, the brand that I had been identified would have made me a social misfit. The speculation was due to working directly with my boss and due to my position as a personal assistant, I am always together with her. The work of a personal assistant is challenging; it requires whole commitment in attending meetings within and without the office. It is astonishing to realize the misinterpretation that I am having an affair with my boss. It is not only unethical but also uncalled for in working relations code of conduct. I assert that the accusations are baseless and unwarranted.
As a matter of fact, the boss’s secretary started this rumor. She spread the speculation among the staff mates. It happens that I have excellent empathy with the majority of the workers. This relationship prompted one of my closest friends who called me for a drink and described how the rumor was swiftly painting a negative image of both my boss and me. The magnitude of the matter put me in a test of critical and creative thinking aimed at solving the problem at hand. Without much ado, I thought wise to seek advice from my counselor. At first, my counselor did not believe that the rumor was not true, but after defending my innocence, he advised me to inform my boss about the hearsay and then, find appropriate measures to go about the issue. I did not hesitate due to the urgency of subverting the spread. As usual, she leaves the office at some minutes to 9 p.m. to catch up with the news at her home, so that evening I met her and gave a detailed explanation of what was speculated. She got confused and ashamed; however, she gathered courage and asked on the way forward. I proposed on a consultative process with all the stakeholders to explain the truth of the matter.
As far as I am concerned, my reputation from the office down to the society as well as my parents is appalling. I cannot explain the images planted in the minds of people. It is imperative to note that the niche, I occupy in the society as a just and moral young man, is tainted and almost empty. I cannot stand and convince my work mates, friends, and parents that all these are lies. However, I am determined to prove the rumormongers are wrong. I assert that whatever is being spread about my working relations with my boss is unwarranted and untrue. Presently, I can attest that my reputation is not the same. It is ruined. It requires a lot of courage and convincing facts to set the records straight. My boss and I have taken a consultative course addressing the workers and the continued plan to talk to the husband and then, the friends will work towards clearing the lies. These efforts are genuine, honest, and ethical.
On the other hand, when the rumors went around outside the office, they first reached my parents. It is not normal to find my parents waiting for because my schedule is not dictated by working hours. On that day, as I put my diary on the table, I heard an exclamation from my mother. She seemed fed up with my image in front of her. I sensed something might be disturbing her. A soft voice followed me to the kitchen: “What is this that we are hearing? My son, did you forget the teachings and Christian values we have taught you since your childhood? Is it true, you are in love with your boss? Tell me the truth.” I knew that she was disturbed. I explained to her how that information was malicious and was meant to taint my image in the society. However, I realized the silence of my father indicated dissatisfaction. My father did not utter a word concerning the issue.
My father’s silence sent some signals to me. He thought I was just defending what is true instead of accepting. It hurt me when my father assumed that the rumor was true and may be it justified his perception on my late coming. This was a clear indication that my parents remained divided in opinion concerning this matter. It reached a point where I optioned to remain unconcerned physically but disturbed inwardly. One thing for sure I trusted was that one day, all this would end.
My mother seemed to understand and accept my explanation, which to the best of my knowledge is true and honest. It is notable that my father has a grudge on me over this issue. He indicated to me two days later, cannot believe my stand on the issue, that even some of work mates had sent him short messages over the issue long before I decided to face it. This indication put me in a tongue-tied situation because I am not sure what to do in pursuit of convincing him. This scenario is an indication of how families act as pillars in safeguarding family ties and cooperation. It is attestable that I remain uncomfortable until my father accepts my explanation and deletes his perception of the whole situation. That is the moment I will be free in mind.
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On the other hand, this misinformation was not received well by my sweet heart. She believed the lies and made up her mind of leaving me. She did not have any space to listen from my side. She was fed up with me. She never wanted to see me. Here was a scenario whereby all the stakeholders have accepted my side of the story, except my father and my fiancé. Her reaction upon hearing the issue was unbearable. This huddle required wisdom because the scenario involved two women,: one whom I had interest and the other one – my boss. It required me to do everything at my disposal to balance redeem my relationship with my girlfriend and sustain my working relations with my boss. I decided to talk to her closest friend so that she can play the role of mediating. At first, she did not see the reason of her friend wasting her precious time mediating for an immoral man, as she perceived. It took a lot of time, efforts, and consultation to convincing her. Thanks to her friend who bravely and wisely approached her. She did everything possible to calm her.
The process included holding a meeting with my boss and her husband. This worked because she saw the sense of a married couple clarifying the issue. This was a moment of relief and peace in my heart. The reason is that I would not imagine of loosing her after dating for a couple of years. At least, I did not lose her. This scenario gave an insight on how this woman trusted and loved me. The realization that all was well with at least all the stakeholders, I looked up and thanked the Almighty God for whom He was in me during the trying moment. The next process was to undergo counseling lessons. Counseling intends to heal and bring back thoughts, energy and focus to the relationships. However, my girlfriend did not indicate any aspect of approving the move for starting counseling lessons. After much persuasion, she accepted. The lessons proved to plan an immense role in accepting and forgetting the past and forging ahead to the future. At the end of the counseling exercise, it emerged that both of us never wanted to wait any longer to get married. I felt, it was the right opportunity to begin the wedding plans. The wedding scheduled to take place in three months time signified happy moments in future after that traumatizing scenario.
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In conclusion, misinformation is dangerous because it can cause immense harm to innocent persons. It is advisable for people to sieve and ascertain information before spreading it. Misinformation can cause a bad reputation, lose of career, and family disconnect. In addition, it should be realized that, besides human being mediation, the true and final mediator is the almighty God.
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