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People work in order to sustain their family. This means that family is a priority. It should be so, because family stays forever, unlike a job. One can never be equal to a job, but will forever be just a paid employee. After all, we work to live, not the other way round. A career can make you achieve wonders, get world recognition, live the American dream. At the end, what really fulfils gives joy and offers security is a family. The comfort of a family exceeds that of a career. The good news is that you can have the best of both lives, if you take time to prioritise well. This list should be in the order of a time out.However, choosing marriage before career is more important, because marriage has a deadline, unlike career.
The advantages of an early marriage
One stands a better chance of having children and healthy children
Women have the choice of choosing their career over marriage. The women who take this road risk loosing a chance of raising a family. This is because the people of this generation face more issues of infertility than any other generation. This is to say that a woman who opts for a successful career before marriage is lowering her likelihood of ever getting children. On the other hand, a woman has a lifetime to get a career. The skills of your career will live longer than your ovaries.
Evidence show that the biological clock of a woman takes a nose dive at 35 years of age. According to geneticists, the Down syndrome cliffs at start that age. Yet it is this Down syndrome cliff, which is a fill in for everything, because a large percentage of infertility starts at the age of 35.
There is also a lot of proof to show that having kids at an interval of two years apart is what is best for the children. However, the first-born children have a distinct advantage. They turn out to be smarter and richer. To top it all up, research shows that 90% of freshmen at Harvard University are first-born kids. This occurs year after year. This advantage mitigates with the second-born and other children, depending on the time difference between the birth orders.
It reduces chances of a miscarriage
A woman, who begins having children at thirty-one years old or more, can have two kids, three years apart, before hitting thirty-five. However, this plan does not take into account the 20% rate of miscarriages. This means that such a woman has an almost 50% chance of having two kids. It would be best if she started at thirty.
A woman, who wants to get children at thirty, should marry at around twenty-eight. This is not a bad idea, because statistics has it that when very young people marry, they tend to end up divorcing. However, the statistics shows that women, who marry at twenty-five, are less likely to divorce. For a marriage to be healthy, experts suggest that people should start having children after the second or third year of being married. An ideal situation would be to date for a couple of years, and to be engaged for close to a year before wedding. Therefore, as a woman, you are to meet the person at the age of twenty-four (Gottman, Silver, 405-476).
Marriage is ofen more fulfilling than a career
From a wide research, results show that people are happier being married than having a good job simply because marriage goes to a personal level. Therefore, one should not choose a good job over marriage. This argument is not only based on what is fair or just, but on what is real. A woman’s biological clock is beyond her control and over issues to do with social justice. So is the workplace. However, you have control over your time and energy. Choose what is best. That is, marriage before career (DeGenova, Rice, Stinnett, Stinnett, 457-478).
For men, it makes sense to devote their twenties to building their career. However, women cannot afford to do this. A woman has to search for a mate with the same vigour that she works for her career, in their twenties. A woman might argue that she is waiting to know herself better. Knowing oneself is a process that lasts forever, and beyond twenty-five years of age, to wait for marriage will not lessen your chances of getting divorced.
There is no confirmation that shows when it is the best time in a woman’s career to have kids. At any moment, a woman is thrown off track. Whenever a woman has children, speaking from statistics, she will begin to earn less money, regardless of whether she takes maternity live or not. Building ones career before raising kids does not guarantee an easy period during a time out within ones career.
Marriage is for the mature, unlike career
Young people, who rush to get married, eventually end up divorcing. This is mainly because they hardly understand themselves, what they want, what is best for them, etc. They can hardly handle their emotions; yet, they expect to handle someone else’s. It is because young people are still developing, and it is at the age of thirty that one can be mature enough to handle marriage. Everything has its own time. During the twenties, people are in the universities trying to prepare themselves for life. Marriage would simply be out of question.
Women, who have not found a suitor at their thirties, should not be blamed for it. It is hardly because they are not focused on settling down. Many times, they make themselves available, but they just cannot find a viable candidate. Some person that is mature enough. It will be rather unladylike for women to start chasing after men or settling for what is below what they want. Marriage can wait, especially if the wait is for finding the right partner.
Raising children interferes with career, which needs practice
Career should come first before marriage because it is extremely difficult to start a career with young children on your way. It is like serving two masters at a time (Arruda, Dixson, 234-306).One can hardly choose between your career and your children. It is best that you do them one at a time. In such case it is more reasonable to get a career first and then to take care about children.
In addition, women, who take a lot of time off raising their children, can have it rough in their career building. We all know that practice makes one perfect. If you are not using the skills that you have obtained, then you are most likely to spend much time trying to get good at your career of interest. Furthermore, careers need to be frequently updated. If one does not take years of time concentrating on his/her career, then they are likely to be knocked out by people who are taking this more seriously(Niles, Harris-Bowlsbey, 98-107).
It is important to be financially stable before starting a family. You cannot afford having children and the enormous responsibility that comes along with it without substantial amount of cash. There are people, who marry without putting such issues into consideration, and at the end of the day, end up regretting or feeling unfulfilled. It cannot be denied that one can pursue his/her career at the expense of marriage and become a happy individual in the end.
A respond to the counterargument
Issue on maturity
Maturity is not only for the thirty year olds. A twenty-five year old is also mature enough for marriage. There are tremendous advantages for marring at an early age. As mentioned above, one can have smart children and reduce the chances for infertility and miscarriage. What is important is to follow the appropriate procedure to know if you are getting married to a compatible partner. People, who put efforts in getting a spouse more than in building a career, have a high chance of settling down early. Getting a partner has a lot to do with where you put focus to.
Issue on child raising
Raising children is a shared responsibility. It is between you and your partner. If you have a well-organised schedule, then the things will fall into place. However, the bottom line remains that a family is more important than a career.
You can start out late in building a career and still stand a chance to make it. However, the longer you take to start a family, the more chances you have on missing one. We start with marriage before the door completely closes out. Furthermore, when you start with raising a family, you will remain with enough time for the rest of your life to work on your career.
Issue on finance
Financial stability is necessary for every level of life. It is important to an individual in particular, and to the government in general. However, trying to achieve financial stability should not be at an expense of raising a family. Nonetheless, the consistence of a family is more defined than that of a career.
It is difficult for people to choose between marriage and career, especially at one’s prime years. However, in the real sense, one does not have to choose between them but only decide which should come first. When marriage comes first then chances are you can have a happy family and a successful career. People get what they have put as top priority. If getting a spouse is what is on top of the list, then that is what you will get. On the other hand, if you focus on your career, then you will probably climb up the ladder of success swiftly. However, between the two, what should come first is marriage, because the biological clock is a reality.
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